reality is so cruel
it really hurts to see people around me upset
i dont feel good when i'm not able to help them
although i'm not the one having problems, i can feel the pain!

a few of them ain't doing very good lately
i get very upset when i see them like these
sometimes, i feel very useless also
cos i really want to help them feel better
but no matter how hard i try, it just won't work
it doesn't help them relieve the pain, not at all
Hais, forget it! no one can understand how i feel at this very moment.
my mood is totally down to the minimum minimum
ahhhh. i am going to take up classes to learn how to make happy pills!

hope the gloomy sky don't stay long
for you, for you, for you and for me!
i know things will get better as time goes by
so! no matter how hard life is
as long as we have great friends around
every thing's going to be a-o-kay!
trust me.

i'll give you all the support and strength you need
to help you carry on and move on with life
we'll pull through this tough time TOGETHER alright!

this post is dedicated for someone special
well, to me at least.

happy brithday to you
happy birthday to you
happy birthday to shirley
happy birthday to you!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SWEETEST BUDDY! :D

hope you had a great time with him today.
i owe you a good good meal yea.
redeem it after your A levels lar! haha.
take good care and study hard alright.
Good luck for your exams in the coming 2 weeks babygirl! (:

i'm like quite tired now. eyes are closing already! but i cant sleep yet
going to force myself to stay awake until the clock strikes 12am!
it's somebody's special day tmr. yayness! hahaha.
managed to meet up with her for like a short short 15 mins!
i know she hasn't been good lately
i want to know what happen
i want to catch up with her on how she's doing
i want her to feel better and move on
and I'd very much want to spend more time with her
but the thought of her needing to study for her A levels
i had no choice but to let her go home early
Buddy! i really hope you like the present i gort for you yea. :D
You hang on there for just one more month
Everything's going to be over by then
and you can have fun already! *Wide Smile*

somehow i just feel that time is crawling man.
work is so boring that i keep counting down to 5pm everyday
i dont know why, i just feel that work is damn sucky now
i wanner go back to study. life as a student is always the best! ahhh.

the night is old already.
once the clock strikes 12.10am
i'm very sure i'll be sound asleep! hahaha.
finally tmr is friday. weekend mood is here.
hoooray!

2 cups of coffee everyday really can make me wide awake
awake until i cant get to sleep. ):
i know i am tired and i want to rest early too
but, the caffeine is taking effect now. shit!

work has been extremely extremely boring
i don't want to talk about it already lar.

today after work i went home first
then head to vivo to meet dearest
walk around to look for a nice present for my buddy
after i bought the present, dearest went to have dinner with her friend
and i took a bus ride home which took me freaking 1 hour.
it's a damn good way to stone and waste time. serious. haha.
in exactly 25 hours and 12 mins, it'll be buddy's birthday
as well as halloween. nothing spectacular to be excited about though.

i'm going to do some sheep counting now!
Goodnight to the whole wide world!
Sugar honey candy dreamsssss. :D

today i shred paper the whole day!
can you imagine how bored i was?! ):
the worst thing is, i got injured while shredding paper.
you must be wondering how can someone injure herself while shredding paper right? yes, i'm just that clumsy! i hurt my toe and it bleed.
stupid, yes i know. HAHA!
i'm getting sick of attachment alr.
Most of my friends are so busy and packed with things to do.
While i had nothing but dozens of paper to shred. damn it! i need more work. and i mean meaningful tasks and not 'sai kung' please.
2 reports done. which means i'm left with 3 more months to the end of internship. looking forward yet not. end of internship also means i'll be at the T-Junction.

i still do not know what i want to do yet. Uni or Work? Uni or Work? Uni or Work? hais. i need some happy pills now.

hokayy! enough of the sad stuffs. i shall talk about happy happy stuffs!
the past 2 saturdays i've been down at bukit gombak stadium!
i guess some of you may know why. yea it's track and field ivp.
i had my event on the first day. the second day i was there to support the team.

that was happiest day in the whole of my Ngee Ann Track & Field life!
just imgaine this okay: the organiser announcing the overall results.
"Track & Field IVP 3rd position" - Ngee Ann Polytechnic!!!!
The whole lot of us just go - YEAAAAAAAAH!!!!
and we screamed and shouted like nobody's business.
i know it's hard for you to imagine how happy we were and how the situation was like. it's just havoc with lots of screaming and shouting lar.
before the start of ivp, i had this hunch that we might not be able to make it as the top poly. because NYP is super strong this year.
the first day results have proven that fact.
we were lagging behind at the 5th position as at the end of day 1. but our team has really fought hard and we've won ourselves many of medals on the 2nd day! haha. we're not lousy at all okay, its just that the best has yet to come only! lol. this is really the best achievement i had in the whole of 3 years in Ngee Ann Track & Field Team!

Trackers, fielders and jumpers! We've finally made it! We fought as a team, supported each other through and eventually We win as a team. all the tough trainings were finally made worthwhile! Thank you Coach Qi and Coach Er! Both of you never give up on us and we hanged on together as a team! We're really damn happy to have you both as our coaches. Thank you for all your hard work coaches! Not forgetting, thanks to all everyone who made it possible, be it taking part, earning pts for the school or supporting the team. thank you everyone! (:

Well, some of you might be wondering. Aiya, 3rd position only whats there to be happy about right?! Let me correct you here. Track & Field is a sport that is very dependant on individual effort. Most of the events are individual events. It is not easy to train and definately not easy to win. Track and Field IVP game is where all the Unis, Polys and ITE come together to compete with their best runners, throwers and jumpers. Many of the national athletes come from the NUS and NTU. It is very obvious that we wont be able to win them with the athletes we send out because we are not as good as the nationals. If our athletes are really that good, they would have been in the national team long ago. You compare T&F with those team based sports like Canoe, floorball, soccer or dragon boat. There can never be a full team of national athletes coming from Unis in these sports. Therefore, it is definately much easier to win in team sports as compared to individual based sports like T&F.

So, you seee! Winning a overall 3rd position is something we can really be proud of! Moreover, the 2 schools in front of us were NUS and NTU. This gives us more reason to be proud of ourselves man! Not only did we managed to maintain the best poly position, we also emerged as the overall 3rd position behind NUS and NTU!
Ngee Ann Track & Field Team HUAT AH! lol.

After the whole event end, we took photos as usual.
then we headed off to clementi woods for sakura buffet as a team!
finally we can have a big big spread. coaches were there with us too.
we're just like a happy big family! hahaha.
that day was also gabriel's birthday. we bought him a card and a cake.
had a mini celebration at sakura.
we really wrecked the whole sakura man.
the place was full of our voices and laughters!
Ohh, and we saw NUS team there as well.
After ivp, everyone also like dont care alr. Anyhow eat man! haha.
Dinner ended at 9 plus 10. Then we took a bus back to school.
Stayed over was just crazy! never had so much fun before.
did alot of stupid things and the night just ended so fast.
When i got home on sunday i slept all the way until 8pm.
Damn shiok i tell you! hahaha.
Monday was report chionging day. I was rushing the report like mad.
I think i asked for it myself lar. should have finished it before the weekends but i didnt. ):

Alrighty, so much words. I'll upload the photos once i get them from the rest. Maybe my next post? Stay tuned yea! :D

here are the photos taken on friday after our HR dinner. let keep this going alright. whenever i see them, all the unhappy things will just be cast aside. i dont know why! hahaha. (:

it feels so damn good to be part of ngee ann track and field team
i finally see the team unity today after so long
hearing them cheering for one another for their different events
and screaming their lungs out when the athletes did well
this is something that you don't see in other schools
i dont mean that the other schools dont cheer their team-mates on, it's just that they are not as enthu as we are i guess. good job guys. :D

anyway, i'm super proud of the team today!
everyone did their best and we've proven to others that we are still as strong or maybe even stronger this time round
it's just the first day only, and the best has yet to come. haha.
more medals and of course more points are coming our way!
ohh, i broke my PB today too. though i din win any medal, i'm still happy because i managed to secure 4 pts for ngee ann! yayness. hahaha.
am having a mild sore throat now. shit, i need to drink more water.
after they call it a day, we took photos with the school's principal and director of SDAR who came down to cheer us on. as if it was the last day of competition like that. but who cares right. haha.
then we headed to mac for dinner. very sinful indeed!
but just take it as a reward for the good job done today lar. lol.

next week is the final day where our placing will be determined.
no matter what the result is, we'll end it off with a good good meal together as a team alright! i'll be so looking forward to the buffet dinner and the stay-over man!

haha. alright guys, please stay strong and hang on till the very end yea.
we'll UNITE and pull it through AS A TEAM okay!!!
Meanwhile, it's time to get some good rest.
it's been a exhausting day for everybody.
please also take good care over the next one week.
keep yourself conditioned and refrain from any injuries.
just wanner say, thanks to all the supporters who came by to support the team today.
and also, thanks alot to ethan, sean, patrick, yonghong and a few long jumpers for popping by when i was having my event just now. it did gave me an additional motivation! thank you very much! (:

TMR is an important day
for all track&field members from polys, ite as well as universities!
everyone has been training very hard just for this day
though i'm not very optimistic about this year's result
i'm pretty sure we wont come in last! HAHA.
this is perhaps the last year that i'll be involved in such event
dont know how i should feel about it. i hope it's gonna turn out fine.
anyway, i can predict that by the end of tmr, i'm sure gonna lose my voice. LOL!

okay, it's quite late now considering the fact that i have event tmr.
uh yea, i'm heading to bed soon!

to all NGEE ANN TRACKERS & FIELDERS:
let's just do our very best on the 2 Saturdays. Clinch that TOP POLY title again this year alright! i know there is bound to be nervousness, adrenaline, fear, butterflies in the stomach and other stuffs like that. whatever it is, just think straight, smile and GO! we cant afford to make any more mistakes at this stage. So, good luck and all the best people! (:

didn't sleep well the past few days
keep waking up in the middle of the night
not just one time, but a few times
is it because i had too much stress?
but can someone tell me where does this source of stress come from in the first place?! hahaha.

training today was a disappointment
shall not elaborate on that
btw, many people are still injured
and i'm like thinking how can man?
competition is just this weekend,
they sure wont be able to recover on time. Shit!
who knows, the next thing that i found out was
i got injury too. my shin splint came again! ):
it always happen whenever i put on my spikes
tell me am i suay or am i suay? tsk tsk tsk
well, i just have to spend the next 3 days taking good care of myself
that is the bare minimum of my responsibility

my pay cheque is finally out
it's been sucha LONNNNNGGGGG wait man i swear!
time to clear all my debts and get some new stuffs that i've been wanting. YAYNESS!

okayy, tonight got to sleep early
because i need to wake up earlier tmr to prepare my lunch
thinking of what to eat everyday is very tiring
especially when you have to prepare it yourself!
i'm running out of ideas. helppppp.

still got some time before i sleep, i shall go watch my HK drama.
CIAO everybody! (:

i get very tired easily ever since internship started
don't ask me why because i also wanner know why
it's like once i got home, no matter late or early
i will just feel like sleeping after i bathe
is this how working life is supposed to be like?!
eeeekkkk! i seriously don't like it lar

anyway, Saturday is ivp already
and i cant really tell how exactly i am feeling now
i don't feel the pressure
i don't have the nervous feeling(maybe not yet)
i don't feel the hype
i just don't have the kind of feeling i have last year
oh man, this is kinda sad isn't it?

the next two weeks' gonna be quite busy
i don't know how am i going to finish my report
at this moment, i still don't have the mood to start on it
it's giving me a headache actually
because i have no idea what to write about
doing the routine work doesn't give me additional stuffs to write a 3 page report! ):

okay time check:11.08pm , quite tired now
considering the fact that there's training tmr, i should rest soon. yes!
goood night and sweeeet dreams!

in exactly one week's time,
it will be the day which we are all looking forward to!
i dont want to disappoint myself.
so i'll just tell myself, winning is almost impossible.
getting a minimum of 1 point is what i must fight for.
2 more trainings to go, all i can say is i'll try my best!

it's been a tiring week.
very busy at work and at after work programmes.
finally it's weekend. but i'm quite sad that it's gonna end sooon.
i dont like the monday blue feeling.
and i bet no one likes it too. hahaa.

as usual, the HR peeps met up again ytd.
it was said to be once every 2 week,
but i think we have to reconsider it again.
thank you miss soh for the little catch up talk.
thank you miss fong for dropping by for half an hour.
they are really the best tutors in the whole of ngee ann.
we are just like friends to one another,
catching up with each other's life.
even though the turn up rate was super low, it doesnt matter.
i know everyone has their own commitments and things to do.
it wouldnt be fun if people drag themselves to come or are being forced to turn up. so, i was enlightened by miss soh and i felt better after i heard her words. THANKYOU so much! ((:
honestly speaking, i'm not angry or disappointed.
i'm just abit affected that's all.
anyway, it doesnt matter anymore. i'm fine now! reallyyy.

school's starting for most of my friends.
i wonder if the 4 of us can still meet up often.
things may be different once the semester starts.
especially with mui going to a different class as them.
hey mui whatever it is,
you've got to work doubly hard this time round yea.
i know i sound like a grandma keep nagging at you. hahaa.
just hope you feel the good intention.
and i want you to graduate with all of us okay!
alll the best for your last sem wild boar. :D

okay, i want to enjoy my weekend already. ciaos everybody.
who knows i will update again in a few hours time.
i am mad yeaaaa.

this is the second time i'm blogging today
just got back from kanglun's 21st birthday party
his house is like an oven man, so warm!
been through many birthday parties recently
they more or less are the same
reach there eat, then chit chat while waiting to cut cake
after that open present then we all go home
thats about it, nothing spectacular! haha.

i am very very tired, but i dont wanner go to bed!
weekends are very precious to me now and for the next 4 months
i just wanner make full use of it now. hahaha.

ivp in 2 week's time
if you ask me whether i'm prepared
i'll tell you my answer is NO
no need to explain
i think its easy to see
for one, i dont have any passion in the event i'm taking
i'm taking it because i want to help the team
for two, my performance during training has been very poor
for three, i dont have much time leftttt
i really miss running a lot a lot
thinking back, i should have been persistent
and not let the little setback pull me down
if i had not given up, many many things would have been different now
this is really one of the regretful decision i've made in life. ):
oh my, this feeling totally suck and i hate it.
let's hope i'll be able to get over it soon. like really soon.

okay time check, it's 00.42am now! still cant sleep, i'm going to watch youtube! GOODNIGHT EVERYBODY!

This is for the trackers, throwers and jumpers: Please continue to train hard for the next 2 weeks. Whatever it is, we've already come so far and it's too late to pull out now. I know the amount of effort and hard work you all put in is unmeasurable. So, hang on and it'll soon be the time to show what we are made of alright! Jia you! (:

look at the time i'm posting now
i woke up late today
couldnt make it down to school for the bus
so, i shall take a public transport
and since i still have some time, i should just blog

its been a week already
so far so good
i managed to hold back the urge
seriously its not easy
especially when you already have that kind of habit
i sound as if i'm talking about smoking yea
fortunately, i'm not! haha.
i'm talking about text msges

this week, for the whole week i've been going out
had a lot of fun and spent a lot too
pay has yet to come, damn sian can
i felt the days are like crawling
because i'm so looking forward to payday.
so many days moreeeee. ):

some times i wonder
people always say 2 person
who have a complete different personality
where they come from 2 totally different worlds
will not stay in a relationship for long.
then what about friends?
have this come across your mind?
2 person with totally different hobbies, family background, habits, lifestyle
basically just very very different from each other
can they be good friends? hMmMmMmM. think about it.

okay, SO LATE already!
i have to go now. ciaos!